Saturday, September 22, 2007


From the Archives

(March 2005) I woke up sobbing this morning—big, gasping, painful sobs—and all I could do was curl up into a ball and wail. I don’t remember what I was dreaming either and I wish I did.

Started my dang period last night too, blast it all, which made me think about that bad penis envy poem I included a couple of entries ago.

Here’s the thing. I don’t envy a dick—can replicate it fine for fucking purposes and love the pleasure the body parts I have provide me—but I do envy the ability to have any kind of sex I want any day of the month I want without bleeding everywhere and do not particularly like spending 5 or more days a month bleeding.

Gotta get back to work now but, first, let me add Rob Brezsny’s latest Free Will Astrology horoscope:
A recent poll revealed that more and more people are enjoying oral sex. In the last three years alone, the percentage has increased from 74 to 79 percent. For members of the Aquarian tribe, that figure is likely to zoom precipitously upward in the coming weeks, as will the sheer number of erotic encounters involving the lips and tongue. In fact, all activities involving pleasure with the mouth are likely to lead to success and happiness, including (but not limited to) gourmet eating, loud singing, and wild talking. For extra credit, try combining two activities: gourmet eating and wild talking, for instance, or singing and oral sex.

I recommend champagne and sex myself. Mmm.

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